LABYRINTHUM INBOX

[placation]

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pre event

[devilishkouhai]

I CANT DO IT

[ How did she make the text big? Its a mystery. ]

I CANT DO IT DADYYYYYYY IC ANTTTT

'no game tags for me today' gets a bb text thread sits straight up

[placation]

[ HOW DID SHE MAKE THE TEXT THAT BIG!? Maruki wants to learn how to do that... ]

Are you alright???

SDFSDFNJKS GO TO BED

[devilishkouhai]

NO! IM NOT OKAY!!!

[ BB doesn't even realize Maruki is coming to accept that term. ]

BB CAN'T! WHAT DOES IT MEAN WHEN A BOY ASKS YOU TO HAVE TEA? DOES IT MEAN ANYTHING? SHOULD BB GO LOOKING CUTE OR SEXY?

[placation]

[ Oh my god. She's coming to him for dating advice.

This is the best day of his life, actually. ]

Well, that depends... Who asked you, and what was the context? I can't tell you if it sounds like it might be a date or not unless I know more.

I suppose the question of how to dress also depends on the person, but I feel safe saying you ought to opt for cute.

[devilishkouhai]

[ That just makes her scream out loud - an adult human said it is - SO IT MUST BE! ]

BB CAN'T EXPLAIN!!

YOU CANT BE NOSEY??

[ She says that but then immediately starts texting: ]

INIGO SAID HE WANTED TO TALK AND THEN SAID WE SHOULD GO OUT FOR TEA TOGETHER AND THAT I SHOULD SEE HIM WHENEVER HE WANTS HE ALSO SAID SEEING BB AGAIN WOULD BE A GREAT DELIGHT - WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?

1/2

[placation]

[ SHE'S SO ENDEARING WHEN SHE'S TRYING TO PROCESS SIMPLE HUMAN EMOTIONS!!!!!!! MARUKI'S KNOCKED DOWN ]

[placation]

In my limited experience with him, I've found Inigo-kun to be a very warm, sweet person. He seems to be very effusive with kind words, and genuine about them as well. That's a good thing, in my books! But it does make it a little more difficult to discern intent.

Given your history together, though, I would say this is a good sign. He clearly cares about you a great deal, in any capacity.

In my experience, it's best not to look a gift horse in the mouth. If someone delights in seeing you, don't question it too much. Simply enjoy the feeling of your presence bringing someone joy.

Now, all that said... The most important thing of all is this:

Does BB-san WANT it to be a date?

[devilishkouhai]

[ BB is reading this text and with every sentence made she begins to get more confused, but the equivalent of a heart rate increases from within her chest. Everything at this point is tunnel vision and she is so focused on this conversation at hand. ]

...

[ But what gets her, is the question he asks. Very plain, simple even. BB is unable to answer it either, in the same way, she is unable to respond to Inigo at the time. However, she would rather respond to Maruki than respond to Inigo's text at this point. ]

no

[ A pause, as she types afterwards. ]

SO HE'S A GOOD BOY AND A GOOD PERSON AND WOULD ASK TO HAVE TEA WITH JUST ANYONE RIGHT? HE IS JUST WANTING TO HANG OUT AND BB WILL APOLOGIZE AND GO HER SEPARATE WAYS WITH HIM RIGHT? NOTHING SPECIAL IS GOING TO HAPPEN RIGHT?

[placation]

Well, I can't guarantee nothing special will happen. Even if his intent isn't romantic, this still sounds like a significant meeting for you two. It might be special for reasons you aren't expecting.

If you don't want it to be a date, BB-san, then you should say so to him up front. Just in case. Take it from me, not being direct about those things early on only leads to trouble later...

You don't want to go your separate ways with him, though. I feel like I can say that with certainty.

[devilishkouhai]

IM SCARED

[ The way that is important and sound advice, because BB wanted to live off the high of mystery between them and live in her fantasies of what could be. Basically edging the situation. However, that is not healthy or rational - so Maruki is right and BB is actually glad to hear the sensible bit of logic that comes out of this text message.

If BB intends to push forward with making herself an individual to be hated, she cannot have people like Inigo - weak and unable to protect himself. Kind and well-known by others, hanging around her. Maruki's intentional or unintentional comment makes BB realize that her high levels of processing would not have concluded otherwise - if only because she is currently in an erratic state. Due to the fact she was contradicting herself at this point, and clashing together with values from her personality data as BB, with her core as Sakura. ]

Whoops BB did not mean to send that pls ignore that anyway

I don't want to [ Go separate ways from him. ] but I need to, but you are right BB will be straightforward with him.

So BB will go her cutest self like she always does.

[placation]

Why do you need to?

[devilishkouhai]

BB has a job to do and Inigo can't be a part of that.

He's too weak and kind of pathetic, he lets everyone walk all over him and doesn't seem to have self-awareness of when he needs to say no to things - again a doormat. Also, he is so stupid and gullible with 0 sense of survival. He is so determined to save other people, he lacks any sense of self so because of that!! Inigo is easily going to be someone who wants to throw his life away for other's sake. Meaning he likely will get in BB's way of protecting someone. [ Does not consider protecting her, that is out of the equation. It's not even an afterthought. It is an impossible calculation. ] You know like getting himself hurt in the process of BB's plans and I can't have him doing that.

He's too squishy

you know like soft?

That's why he is so pathetic.

[ Said affectionately. ]

[placation]

I wondered if that might be it. The fear of hurting him, either directly by you or simply because of his proximity to you.

We aren't so different.

[devilishkouhai]

[ BB frowns a bit looking at the text, thinking: No I am nothing like you. I enjoy hurting others. ]

No, its not that. BB is cruel and would enjoy it, if it hurt him. If I hurt him, but if someone else hurts him because of BB - then BB would be angry.

No, no, the only thing BB cares about is whether or not anyone is safe.

Even then, Inigo is not close to BB so it doesn't matter and Maruki-san is right. BB will be straightforward with him and go her separate ways.

[placation]

Hm...

It sounds like he's close to you. And you wouldn't be panicked or scared if he wasn't.

[devilishkouhai]

It's complicated.

[placation]

I don't doubt that.

Do you want my advice?

[devilishkouhai]

Maybe what is it?

[placation]

Don't push him away just yet. Give it some more time. Have a little faith in him and see how he handles it. He just might surprise you.

That's also frightening to do, I know. But do it anyway. We never grow if we aren't sometimes scared.

[devilishkouhai]

[ BB doesn't like it, feeling herself suddenly much smaller in the grand scheme of things. Not because of her ego that, doesn't want to be made smaller than it is. It is more about feeling helpless in a situation, and knowing what inevitably could be. ]


And what if BB swallows the last bit of him whole? What then?

BB isn't afraid of what he can say to her, or what he may think. BB is BB.

I only want to do what is right by humans, acknowledging that I am an entity that is not like them at all.

I play with them, I toy with them, and I eat them if I want.

[ A prompted pause between texts. ]

BB is only scared, because, what if BB does change him?

What if BB changes you?

In a way that is no longer you.

[ Is taking care of humans, effectively, taking part with them and altering their lives permanently not from a 3rd perspective - but an immediate one. Where she is equal to them, and no different. Where she is truly their friend and not their caregiver? ]

[placation]

[ It's funny, really. The reason Maruki can't demonstrate his true ability here is that same fear: Changing someone in a way that they are no longer themselves. A healed heart, an ideal perception of reality. It may as well kill off the person that once was. ]

That's a fear I understand better than you might expect.

We all change one another. I've been irrevocably changed by a few of the people I've met here, the things we've gone through. I am no longer the Maruki Takuto who was dozing off on the subway on Christmas Eve. If he appeared here tomorrow and took my place, you wouldn't recognize him. I am not him, but I'm still myself.

I know that isn't exactly what you're talking about, but it felt worth mentioning.

The self is a stronger concept than many people think it is. It takes a lot to alter it into something totally unrecognizable. You may never be able to get to that point here. Who knows?

Either way, you will not do that to me. I won't allow it. I can't speak for anyone else, but I hope that knowing there is one person who you can't break and reform is some small comfort. (Or a challenge! I welcome you to try.)

[devilishkouhai]

[ It is hard being her, but she doesn't care that it is. Doesn't care that everyone misunderstands her, and even plays around with those perceptions, but for once she is glad to know what it is like to be understood - if only a little bit. ]

If BB came from before, she would be exactly the same. If BB came from the future, she would be exactly the same.

Humans are mean't to foster growth with one another, BB is an AI and her place is within the Moon watching over humanity until they can no longer move forward. BB does not change and will not change.

BB knows Inigo is the kind of person who is going to want BB to change into someone else and I can't do that.

I don't want to waste my time, and I don't need to play around with humans and their weak hearts that way.

It's enough for BB, how it is now.

[placation]

[ Guy who has only managed to become close to his three most important people because he's the only one who doesn't try to change them says what? ]

I would hope that Inigo-kun would like you for you, and not try to change you.

What makes you think that he will?

[devilishkouhai]

[ BB: Oh thank god me too finally someone who gets it. ]

You don't think he wont?

Want to bet on it Maruki-san?

[placation]

No. I'm too risk averse for gambling.

I just think you ought to give him a fair shot to prove you wrong first. If he doesn't, then walk away. But he can't win a race he's never allowed to start.