OPEN POST

[placation]

if you can dream it, you can thread it

(you can pm me here or on plurk if you'd like to beforehand, but also if you'd just like to drop something at my doorstep with no preamble please do!!)

Comments

[enteloki]

[Phone clutched so close!!! To his chest!!! As he walks down a hall, plopping right under an affixed photo of his mom to enjoy his lukewarm, half cooked noodles. ]

Did you have fun at work? Did you make a friend? Are you in the unconscious?

[Phone at his side!!! Speaker on!! It's noodle time pogchamps. He makes a happy lil 'mm' as he munches.]

Are you happy today?

NOT UNDERNEATH THE PHOTO SHUT UP

[placation]

[ Maruki has to bite his cheeks to not laugh out loud; the way that Akechi tries to understand his research is so endearing... ]

No, I didn't make it to the unconscious today, unfortunately. Maybe next time!

[ Or maybe never. ♥ ]

But I did have fun! And I'm always happy when I get to talk to you. I guess students are kind of like friends... They don't come talk to me about Black Condor and Blue Swan, though. What a drag, huh?

family snack :)

[enteloki]

You can make them talk about it if you use your words. You have to say-

[In between happy little slurps of shitty noodles-]

'Hi, I like your keychain. Do you like Featherman?' and then they'll say yes and you can talk about it. I'll coach you.

[placation]

[ Painfully cute... ]

How about next time you have a school holiday, I bring you to my office? You can ask anyone that comes in about Featherman and show me how it's done.

[ That's enrichment for exhausted grad students and for Akechi. Win/win! ]

[enteloki]

I have a holiday tomorrow.

[He sure as hell doesn't, but he wants to Go There Now. His other families didn't pay attention to stupid things like school schedules!!! TRUST AND BELIEVE!!!]

I'll help you make a lot of friends.

[placation]

[ Too bad. This family has the school schedule stuck up on the refrigerator alongside every drawing he's ever done. But Maruki can play along. ]

Oh yeah? What's the holiday?

[enteloki]

[Fuck.]

I don't remember.

[A beat.]

I have a headache.

[Another slurp.]

Don't ask my teacher - she won't remember either, but it's an official holiday. They said it on the announcements.

[Oh, crunchy noodle blob. Big Munch.]

My legs hurt.

[placation]

[ Guess who's still too soft and gets duped by this? Maruki does!!! Rumi would call him out on his shit immediately, but not this man. Not this stupid, stupid man.

The headache only makes sense with all that sodium, but– ]

What happened to your legs!?

[enteloki]

I don't know.

[Because he's a fucking liar. Eren bit them. He hasn't a goddamn clue. Should he feel a sense of guilt for duping his guardian like this? TIME WILL TELL.]

You'll have to carry me to the train.

[placation]

[ That's not much different from always; Akechi usually asks, and Maruki's not strong enough to say no... ]

You didn't fall down or anything while you were trying to get your backpack, did you?

1/2

[enteloki]

[Big slurp!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!]

[enteloki]

Yeah, I fell. Really hard. I hit the ground and everything. I tripped.

[placation]

Are you bleeding?

[ Akechi. Please hear that very genuine concern in his voice. With great adorable beloved son power comes great adorable beloved son responsibility. PLEASE. ]

[enteloki]

[lmao lol.]

Yeah, I'm bleeding. That's why my legs hurt so much.

1/3

[placation]

Oh no–!!

[placation]

[ Wait, hold on. Remember that you're not supposed to sound panicked when a child gets hurt, because it will only scare them more. Be calm and strong. Take a deep breath. Don't think about him sitting all alone in the apartment with bloody knees!!! ]

[placation]

[ Try again. ]

I mean, ah... I'm glad you told me. We'll get you patched up. Just hang tight and I'll be home in– twenty minutes or so, okay?

[enteloki]

Okay. I'll sit right here.

[Except he obviously doesn't by the way he starts to shuffle up to his feet - cup ramen is gone! Time to put it in the trash! He'll BRB, King.]

Wait - hold on. I'll be right back. You stay there.

[Maruki's a fuckin phone, but whatever! STAY THERE.]

[placation]

G– ah, alright. I guess I can't stop you...

[ And now he's the idiot waiting patiently for a child to pick up the other end of the line again as he walks to the train station. ]

1/????????

[enteloki]

[And thus, Maruki's hell begins. It's a small apartment, so Akechi's excitable voice carries through no matter where he seems to go.

The cup is tossed into the trash. A melodious 'clean up, clean up' following as he pushes the step stool back to its rightful place, washcloth straightened, cabinet closed.]

[enteloki]

BIRD!

[BIRD?

AT THE WINDOW? BIRD? AT THE WINDOW?]

WOW!

[enteloki]

Hi bird. Hello bird.

[Softest voice ever. The stepstool slid back out and across the floor. Someone's climbing up counters and something falls with an 'oops.' Don't worry about it.]

Okay, here and...

[Window slides open with so much Effort™, but-]

[enteloki]

[BIRD

FLIED AWAY. Oh. Disaster. Oh. Hell. Oh. The saddest day of his life, oh.]

Come back.

[Oh he's on the verge of tears. Oh, he's so sad. Oh, worst day of his little life.]

[enteloki]

WOW! That's a big dog!!!

[The tears stop flowing with the appearance of a Really Big Dog. The neighbor is talking through the window now - mumbles and murmurs. Akechi asking all kinds of questions about Eren De Poochi. Such a weird name.]

I love him! Can he play at the park tonight?

[UNCLEAR THE OUTCOME. AKECHI SOUNDS HAPPY ANYWAY.]

Okay, bye! Come back tomorrow!

END

[enteloki]

[Oh, right.

He was doing something.

Window shut! Stepstool put up! He hobbles back over to the hallway to say 'bye' to his mom and pick up the phone on the ground.]

Hello?