[ Maruki has seen Dolph emotional before, several times over, but never like this.
They're defining saving someone differently right now, focusing on different aspects, different times – different realities. All of these pains bubbling to the surface and boiling over are ones he still carries from home. There's nothing Maruki can do with those, no ways to undo past mistakes, no real way forward from them that will make up anything to people that simply aren't here.
There's nothing he can do, and even if there was–
He wouldn't. A lesson hard learned over nearly a year in purgatory.
So he won't argue it, try to convince Dolph otherwise. Won't placate and smooth over old wounds ripped wide open. The best thing he can do, he knows now, is to simply allow every ugly, torturous feeling pass through him, and hold it all in two safe hands.
After all – has Dolph ever been allowed to simply break down, without any expectation that he has to piece himself back together? Has anyone ever held him through the worst of that dark night of the soul and let him just be?
Maruki can make an educated guess. And he can make up for that now.
He tugs Dolph in against his side until he can turn his body in toward him, as if to shield him from the world, both arms wrapping tight around his back to let Dolph bury into his chest. One hand cups the back of his head, fingers sifting through dark hair, quiet words murmured down into his crown. ]
You can let it out. Feel it all. We can only grow by accepting who we are and who we used to be.
And even if all of that is true, you're still Dolph. I love you anyway.
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They're defining saving someone differently right now, focusing on different aspects, different times – different realities. All of these pains bubbling to the surface and boiling over are ones he still carries from home. There's nothing Maruki can do with those, no ways to undo past mistakes, no real way forward from them that will make up anything to people that simply aren't here.
There's nothing he can do, and even if there was–
He wouldn't. A lesson hard learned over nearly a year in purgatory.
So he won't argue it, try to convince Dolph otherwise. Won't placate and smooth over old wounds ripped wide open. The best thing he can do, he knows now, is to simply allow every ugly, torturous feeling pass through him, and hold it all in two safe hands.
After all – has Dolph ever been allowed to simply break down, without any expectation that he has to piece himself back together? Has anyone ever held him through the worst of that dark night of the soul and let him just be?
Maruki can make an educated guess. And he can make up for that now.
He tugs Dolph in against his side until he can turn his body in toward him, as if to shield him from the world, both arms wrapping tight around his back to let Dolph bury into his chest. One hand cups the back of his head, fingers sifting through dark hair, quiet words murmured down into his crown. ]
You can let it out. Feel it all. We can only grow by accepting who we are and who we used to be.
And even if all of that is true, you're still Dolph. I love you anyway.